Sugar
by Rasenritsu
Summary: Gaara is drunk - but Kankurou moreso. Onesided GaaSaku. Oneshot. Written for a friend. Tinged with ShikaTema.


Never before had he heard so much noise. Never had he dared to believe that the sound of s stereo could be turned up this far. Never had he dreamed that someone could write such atrocious lyrics.

But despite the loudness of the music and the awful song text, the others present seemed to enjoy themselves nonetheless. In the middle of the dance floor, the clean-blue-eyed girl with the long blond hair who was this party's hostess (Ino, he believed she was called) was dancing provocatively with a twin-buns-brunette, the same one his sister had literally blown off their socks during their match in the Chuunin exams.

Said sister currently lay partially sprawled out over a bench, tangled with the prodigy he recognized as Konoha's strategy-minded genius. Part of him wanted to go over and pull the guy off his sibling, maybe choke him with whatever form of sand was present here, but he didn't.

Mostly because he was too damn tipsy.

His teal eyes darted from left to right, vision blurred by the flashing, color-shifting spots and the slight bit of alcohol he'd downed. Bacardis loosened people up, they said, but so far he wasn't noticing it yet. None of him felt _loose_, except for maybe the contents of his stomach that tried to force their way over to his mouth.

Suddenly, a tall broad figure came sweeping up to him with an impressive sway. After some squinting, he managed to discern who the person was. "Kankurou," He murmured, his head light.

The drunk pre-adult heartily clapped him on the back. "Yo, Gaara!" He uttered, before bringing the small glass he was holding to his lips, only to come to the conclusion there was nothing left of his shot of whiskey. Pinching one eye shut, he held the container above his head and peered into it in search of a left-over drop. Finally, he snorted in disappointment, dropping his arm again. "Damn." Spinning on his feet, he dropped down next to the redhead, tossing his arm over the back of this one's chair. "So, managed to pick her up already?" He slurred, grinning as he nodded towards a cluster of girls.

Following the direction of his gesture, Gaara noticed who he'd indicated. The soft pink stain that appeared on his face was not one caused by the Cosmo Cherry he'd been offered for a starter. Pink, pink, lovely pink hair and – Oh, cherry blossom, beautiful springtime.

Finally, he tore his gaze away from the laughing and chattering Haruno Sakura, and ruefully shook his head. "No," He admitted.

A deep frown appeared on Kankurou's face, and he sat up. "Whazzat?" He poorly articulated, lifting his stretched arm from its position. "You 'aven't smooched 'r yet?" He ran the palm of his hand across the corner of his mouth, and then sternly pointed at the younger of the two, making this one flinch. "You'd betta get to it, broth'r, 'fore some'ne else snatch's 'r." The empty shot-glass was pushed under Gaara's nose. "Take it from me, 'tis happened to me b'fore 'n I'm a pro."

Nervously, the other began etched his gaze into the tips of his shoes. "I see," He muttered, rocking from right to left somewhat – Mostly because he was steadily beginning to lose his sense of balance.

The wasted puppeteer threw his arms up into the air, as if begging the heavens for mercy. "Then get to it, dude!" He exclaimed, his fuzzy looking eyes wide, "Put inta pract'se what I learn'd ya man!" They'd rehearsed this at home more than once, with an uncomfortable Matsuri as the girl who had to be approached.

Well, Kankurou being drunk had never been part of the rehearsal, but that was another story.

The other's shoulders pulled back as his muscles tightened, his breath hitching in his throat. He soon regained his composure again, however, and exhaled deeply. When he raised his chin, the look in his eyes was determined, and he rose from his chair.

"Yeah, you go!" Cheered Kankurou as he watched his little brother approach his crush.

"What the hell are you up to?"

His eyes snapped to the side, to meet the leering ones of his angry, two year older sister. "I put Gaara inta motion," He explained proudly, vaguely waving around with his free hand. He then took a moment to take in her appearance, her skirt crumpled and one of the straps of her bra hanging halfway her arm. " 'Ave you been havin' sex?" He spoke threateningly, eyes narrowing.

Shikamaru, who had been trailing behind the young woman with a somewhat dazed expression, suddenly gave a sharp snort and Temari couldn't help but grin. "He'd wish," She answered, causing the one behind her to scowl. Her amused state of mind quickly evaporated again. "What did you make him do, Kankurou?"

The addressee raised his shoulders, and brought his empty glass of whiskey to his mouth for the second time, apparently having forgotten he'd already done that once.

His actions were interrupted, however, by a scream that was even louder than the music.

"SCREW YOU, PERVERT! _SHANNAROO_!"

Everyone gasped and watched as Gaara was pummeled onto the ground. He crawled up, confused, with a hand to his cheek, rubbing the spot where the pinkette had hit him. Some bystanders ran up to the scene to gather him and drag him away, while others retrained the fuming girl.

As Shikamaru stared with an arched eyebrow, Temari's temper flared. "What did you do?!" She snapped at Kankurou. Had she held a bottle, she would've hit him with it.

The guy seemed to be lost in his own little world, however, and appeared to understand as little of the whole unfolding drama as the red-haired victim had. "I dun' get it," He muttered, his eyebrows knitting together, "It's the best pick-up line ever."

That made the Nara's head snap in his direction, and a grin slowly bloomed. His female companion, however, couldn't help but gape. "You let Gaara … Use a pick-up line … On Haruno Sakura?" She inquired incredulously, shaking her head.

Kankurou pouted. "What?" He demanded, shrugging. " 'Tis a good one." To prove his point, he set his glass down on the empty chair next to him, and then pointed at his sister with both his fingers, thumbs towards the ceiling, as he sent her big, fat wink. "Heya, Sugar, shorty skirt you got there – Wanna dance 'n rub with me?"

Awesome, right?


End file.
